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| Soundless Scream
Jasmeen Manzoor We talk about literacy and values. What for, when the darkness still prevails. We talk about women and their rights. What rights, when in this day and age women are not even considered humans. We are just three years away from the 21st century and
yet we have learnt nothing. Our problems instead of decreasing have
increased out of proportion. The incident I am going to narrate is a true
story in which only the names have been changed. This is about women who
have no access to anywhere. They live in far off areas and suffer problems
that we think are extinct. A few months ago I visited my native village in
NWFP. Passing through Kohat I sensed tension in
the city and saw a lot of men gathered at different places. I am talking
about men only as purdah is strictly observed in this part of the province
and women are not allowed to go out in the open markets. I asked my driver
what had happened and he reluctantly told me that a woman had committed
suicide. He didn't know the whole story so I waited impatiently for my
village where I could ask someone what had happened. There too, everything
was very quiet and the usual chirp of local women was missing. Finally, after meeting everyone I got a
chance to ask one of the females of the house what had happened. So,
silently dabbing her soft blue eyes with her dupatta she told me that
something terrible had happened and because the practice of suicide was
very new to them, she thought a curse was going to envelope the entire
region. She started crying, bitterly cursing the females born in these
areas. She slowly gathered some courage and
started saying that all these 55 years of her life she had witnessed
honour killings and killings for land and the so called killings in the
name of blood but she had never come across a woman committing such a
crime. I was shocked to hear this and asked why she called it a crime? "Because", she replied "now
all the women would be given a bad name". She went on to say that this 18-year-old
girl Zainab had burnt herself to death. Zainab lived in a village some 35
kilometres from Kohat and was widely known for her stunning beauty. She
was the only child of her parents and was sold in the name of marriage to
a well-off family for head money or the saar paisay, as known in Pushto,
at the age of 15, an age when she should have been going to school or
playing with children her age. Young and beautiful and full of life she
stepped gracefully into the folds of a new life without knowing the
tragedy awaiting her. Days
went by and due to strict purdah and honour system observed by them she
was not allowed to visit any of the neighbours or even her parents as her
in-laws insisted that since she had been bought she had no relationship
left with her parents. Later, I found out that her parents were not even
allowed to attend her funeral because according to the in-laws she had
brought bad name to the family. Just to cover up their crime they labelled
a poor innocent girl as corrupt saying that since she committed suicide
without any reason, she must have been carrying someone's illegitimate
child. But of course there was no chance of that as she had not even set a
foot outside the house after getting married. This was just a cover up
story to mislead the village jirga and the higher authorities. She had no
option but to commit suicide, as she was being repeatedly raped and
molested by her father-in-law. Yes, that is the truth that was so
carefully and cleanly distorted. What choice did a little girl of 16 have
who had had to tolerate all this for two years and could not take it any
longer when she finally conceived a child. What went through that little
mind of hers we will never know. No one wants to talk about the incident
as they refuse to believe the truth and those who do believe it are too
scared to bring it up. They talk in hushed tones, weeping silent tears for
the ill-fated Zainab. But what good are these tears. Can they bring her or
her child back, how many more Zainabs have to commit suicides before we
realize the gravity of the situation. It all started happening after one year of
her peaceful marriage. The father-in-law used to be unusually kind to her
and used to hold or touch her hand while taking a cup of tea or food from
her. A slight touch on the butt or a little brush on the breast. The
molestation had started long ago but she did not realize it. When it
started happening too often Zainab felt awkward and started avoiding him.
But how long can you avoid a person living under the same roof. She
complained to her mother- in-law, but was told to keep quiet or else there
would be blood everywhere. She, in return blamed Zainab for seducing her
husband. One day, while Zainab was busy in the
household chores and her husband Zaman Khan had gone to the city for work,
her father-in-law crept behind her and dragged her into the room, not even
scared that his wife might scream or that the neighbours might hear her.
As Zainab struggled to escape she was beaten up and was dragged all around
the house and then finally raped. When the mother-in-law tried to stop her
husband, she was also beaten up till she lost conscience. This then became the order of the day till
the son was away in the city. She was beaten and repeatedly raped for 3
days. When the husband returned the whole episode was concealed from him
and about his wife's bruises he was told that she had injured herself by a
fall. He was not educated enough to realize that such bruises do not occur
from falling, and not in his wildest dreams could he have imagined that
his own father would rape his wife. Her mother-in-law, put her dupatta at
Zainab's feet, crying and giving her all sorts of promises not to say
anything or there would be bloodshed and that her son would kill his
father and go to prison and the whole family would be labelled as tor,
meaning black and corrupt. When Zainab refused to listen to all this she
was threatened that if she said anything the mother-in-law would refuse
all this and she would have to be killed and labelled as a whore. The
first time it happened she screamed and fought with the father-in-law but
she being small and fragile wasno match to the six-foot man. And since the
whole issue was quietened up, Zainab had no choice but to suffer deep
emotional and physical wounds as long as she could bear it. What
choice did she have? She would have lost both ways. And then this terrible
incident became an everyday routine. Whenever possible the father-in-law,
and the non-availability of the husband, made Zainab's life hell and
finally one day, when she learnt of her pregnancy she could not take it
any longer. There was one question she did not have an answer to; whose
child was she carrying: the father-in-law's or the husband's? That fateful morning as the husband left
for work, she slowly got up and moved into the little mud-built kitchen
and poured the can of kerosene oil on her, lighting a single match she
burnt herself. Help came too late and Zainab died a painful death just
like the painful life she was leading. There was only one difference, this
was by her own free will. Her choice of death was the only thing she was
allowed to choose in the entire 18 years of the life she lived. Later,
when the elders of the village intervened and tried to inquire into the
matter, Zainab was labelled as a ‘bad girl’ and blamed for having
illegitimate relations with some one. No man was named because there was
no man. The truth was hidden from the people just to save the family from
bad name and prosecution. The truth came out when one day Zainab's
ex-mother-in-law came to visit her parents. Zainab's father at first did
not let her enter the house, but as she was crying and wailing
hysterically the villagers gathered and requested him to at least hear her
out. Upon entrance, she threw herself at the feet of Zainab's mother
crying and asking for forgiveness. She said that since Zainab's death she
had not been able to sleep because of her sins and the time had come for
her to die. So she wanted to go to God with a clear conscience. She said
that since Zainab's death her husband and son were both very sick, and
were loosing money day by day. She assumed that it was Zainab's curse on
them and she had come to beg forgiveness from the late girl's family. I
never found out if they had forgiven her or not. That hardly makes a
difference anyway? Nothing can bring Zainab back. Zainab's
parents still live in the village, and go through the pain of it every
single day of their lives. There has been no news of the in-laws after the
event. They probably moved out to another village. People have long
forgotten this story of brutal suicide. All they can remember is the girl's black
character and not her pain. As the world moves on this part still lives in the dark ages dominated by male tyranny. But the saddest element is that the female lets him do what he wants. If it would not have been for Zainab's mother-in-law and her fear of the truth, Zainab might, just might, have been alive, or even if dead, she would have died with a clear name. Can we ever light a little flame of hope for these sad eyes, can we make a difference before other Zainabs have to leave this world? Their eyes looked at me as I picked my bag and said good bye to them, they asked me what good my article would do? And to tell you the truth I had no answer for them, just some worthless tears.
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